Commentary: What nature taught me about fatherhood after I lost my dad
Published in Op Eds
It was around this time two years ago that I had to say goodbye to my dad. Father’s Day has felt different ever since.
He was a gentle man of conviction who loved his family deeply and instilled in me values that will last a lifetime. A passionate human rights advocate, he never hesitated to challenge injustice, and he encouraged me to consider those around me—their needs, their interests, their suffering.
It’s because of him that I chose a career in animal advocacy and have always tried to defend the marginalized and overlooked. As Father’s Day approaches, I find myself drawing even more inspiration from him and from other remarkable fathers, including those in the animal kingdom who are just as dedicated to their families and to raising smart, caring, hardworking kids.
I can’t remember a time when my dad wasn’t teaching me important life skills, like how to fix things, solve problems and follow the Golden Rule. Fathers of many other species do the same thing.
Red junglefowl, who are related to roosters, start educating their chicks at just a week old, giving them lessons on survival skills, safety and how to interact with others in their flock. Gorilla dads dedicate a large amount of time to their kids into their teenage years and are often the ones to help siblings settle their arguments. And despite all the necessary guidance and coaching, animals, too, still want to be cool, fun dads. Red foxes cut up with their pups, playing and roughhousing.
After my daughter was born, I learned what it’s like to have surge-of-adrenaline moments when you see something dangerous like an ember-spewing campfire, a speeding driver or a falling object and instantly throw yourself between your child and the threat. Darwin’s rheas—also known as “South American ostriches”—are right there with us. These guys rush at anyone who comes too close to their brood and will even attack small planes. Seagull patriarchs are even more aggressive, likely embarrassing their kids with their protective measures. Anyone who doesn’t keep a wide berth may get whacked in the head, vomited on or pooped on.
Pigeon pops take their role seriously, too. Couples take turns incubating the eggs so that each spouse can rest and eat. Once the hatchlings arrive, parents don’t let them leave the nest until they’re fully grown (an example I’ll be giving my daughter when she wants to start dating, possibly combined with a recitation of seagull defense mechanisms).
And animal parents go to similarly great lengths to provide everything their kids need. When water is scarce, sandgrouse dads will travel as far as 50 miles to find some, soak up as much water as they can in their chest feathers and then fly home drenched and heavy to give their young ones a drink.
I’m fortunate to have a wonderful wife, but I deeply respect the fathers who do it on their own. Single dads exist in the animal kingdom, too. A smooth guardian frog will closely watch over fertilized eggs until the tadpoles emerge, then carry them on his back to a body of water where they can mature into adults.
And committed fish fathers might not have muscular arms to shelter their offspring, but they still hold them tightly. Some species, including colorful Banggai cardinalfish, dragonesque arowanas and certain types of catfish seal their developing eggs in their mouths, going without food for up to a month until they hatch. After that, the self-sacrificing dads can grab an occasional bite to eat as the young fish start to venture out, but the fry still spend their first weeks or months of life in the safety of their fathers’ jaws (kids’ names tattoos not included).
Animal dads even adopt. I read one recent account of a family of Asian barred owlets who took in an orphaned infant owlet and raised him as their own.
So this Father’s Day, here’s to all the devoted dads who are leaving a lasting impact. Especially mine.
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Jeff Zick is the director of response fundraising for the PETA Foundation, 501 Front St., Norfolk, VA 23510; www.PETA.org.
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